We Are

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder
And My eyes saw beauty deep inside you
It’s is not just the memory of 
your smile that illuminates my world
It is your spirit
It radiates warmth and love
Keeping my heart in a trance of magical bliss

I am blessed it is your soul
That has intertwined with mine
For they are creating a dance that will forever be our story
Unmatched and unforgettable…

Until my spirit leaves this shell

To be reunited with yours
I will embrace all that we were
Using our love to guide me

For we are
Eternal

Not Many Words

Lately I have had trouble finding the words to describe the way I feel. Mainly I am focusing on getting my homemade presents in order and my little brother’s visit that my mind hasn’t started nagging me about the “first” Christmas without Matt. Of course I know the day is looming but with so many distractions I haven’t dwelled on the future. Plus, I have learned that giving the future too much attention only cause more heartache and anxiety. Since nothing major has happened with my emotional state (yet) my writing feels
uninspired. I have turned to poetry when all the thoughts in my head don’t seem to make sense.  I long to get my emotions out but I can’t put together the right sentences or overall message of my posts.

I do not want the anticipation of Christmas to cloud my judgment and send me down a road of pain and sorrow when it is not necessary for the time being. Yes, I am sure the closer we get the harder it will be to keep the distressing thoughts at bay but in this moment I will be present. There is beauty all around me and if I give in to the self-defeating thoughts the point of the season will be lost.

With that said I will leave you today with a haiku I wrote. Yes the tone is one of sadness and in contrast to the perserving attitude I am feeling today but this haiku explains the loneliness I feel every day no matter how strong I may seem.

Heavy emptiness

lingers in my longing heart

without you I’m lost

Much love!

Starlight

No moon tonight

No moon light cast upon me

To kiss my face and tell me

All will be right again

My eyes blinded by the vast darkness

Just as I was to lie down in defeat

But a million tiny stars appear

Your voice fills my heart

each glow that touches my eyes

Is a moment in time your soul

grew more in love with me

Each second on Earth we shared was enough to

Overflow the dark night with ever lasting light

No moon tonight

No moon light to show me the way

But a million soft glowing specks

Burn bright enough for me

Now I don’t need the moon

For I always have you